Practice Test 5

ADDICTED TO COMPUTER GAMES?
WHY DON’T YOU TRY FISHING?
HERE ARE FIVE REASONS WHY!
ALAN SIMPSON

Our special correspondent

According to health and exercise specialists, computers are becoming a serious threat to the  health and general well-being of a large portion of our society. Dr. Alan Parsons, of the University of Technology, claims that a kind of “nerd syndrome” is sweeping through our society, and it’s having serious effects on people’s physical and psychological health plus carry-over effects on society itself.

Computer game fanatics easily become absorbed in games, lose track of their responsibilities, and suffer from aches and pains associated with long periods of sitting, not to mention eye-strain.

And the solution? In a light-hearted weblog entry Dr. Parsons suggested that everything can be solved by… fishing! As a countermeasure to computer games, fishing, apparently, has everything to recommend. Here’s why:

1.      Computer screens are two-dimensional and don’t move. Staring at a computer screen is an unnatural fixation that guarantees sore eyes. Fish, on the other hand, move in three dimensions.

2.      At best, computer games provide only a simulation of the real world. It is therefore impossible to get a genuine sense of accomplishment no matter how well you play or how many point you score. In fact, your need for accomplishment will be continually frustrated

3.      Fish never suffer from bugs, glitches, or gremlins. When you go fishing, you can never be e-bombed, stalked, or spammed. You’ll never have to reset or reconfigure a fish.

4.      No matter how exciting a computer game is, you still know pretty much what’s going to happen. But with fishing, you never can tell!

5.      No matter how complicated a game is, it is never as complex as reality. Computer games can be mastered, but you’ll never be an absolute master in the real world. That’s where the real challenges are!